*yawn*

I was doing some on-line shopping at Kohls.com. Good 80% off deals. I might be nice and go pick up Mike 2 at work and with that go to the Kohls in Thousand Oaks. That would be nice of me, don’t you guys think?

Thing is… no coupon – so that kind of sucks. But if I have enough good deals, it won’t matter much!!!

Now I’m just watching Evita on my brothers big screen TV. Laying on his big comfy bed. Very comfortable. Even for my laptop! How nice!

Soon… sleep!

Someone tell me what to do!

I just need someone to tell me what I should do.

I can’t decide. I almost want to tell them both to go to hell and dedicate time to myself. I’m NOT going to do that though.

I think that Trinidad excites me… but I’m getting over it. I think it was just an infatuation. I don’t know that it’s worth continueing. But how do I break up with him. How do I tell him. What do I say. He already thinks I’m cheating. Which, I guess, I am.

I’m still going to move to my bro’s house today or tomorrow. He was planning on coming over today… but no.

I can’t do it. I… fuck. FUCK. Fuck. Fuck. That’s all I can say. I shouldn’t have gotten myself into this. But now I’m in it and I don’t know what to do. I need to tell Trinidad that I just can’t do it anymore… he’s a nice guy, but I think he wants to play more than be serious. I need serious. Right now.

And I talk to him, but I just can’t do it. I’m already crying.

So I lied.

I didn’t know it. I thought it was fine, but I never stopped thinking about it.

Going out with someone whom you didn’t trust from the second time you see them… not a good sign. Not a good idea.

So I have been thinking about it. I kept talking to other guys, because I knew he was doing the same. And I met a wonderful guy. Well, I think he’s wonderful so far.

His name is Mike. He lives in Woodland Hills (a wonderful thing!) He’s 29. Just turned it, so 7 years older than me.

We went to Friday’s last night. It was good.

He’s 6′5′. So very tall. But it works. I bought heels But yea, it’s nice anyway.

His car is broken – so I asked him what I could do to help him out – so he said go and help him look for cars. I like that. Normal everyday stuff. Of course, we just met, but we’re comfortable around each other. That’s REALLY nice. He likes affection as I do.

Trinidad does not like any of that, and I don’t know if I can be with someone who is so detached. I wouldn’t be happy. I could see it in my parents. They have different likes in being emotional with each other, and they don’t get alone.

So yea… still thinking what I’m going to do.

Where?

Where has the time gone?

I thought school started yesterday. It didn’t. Starts next week. Sheesh. They just had to change it.

And……. I really don’t feel like updating this right now.

I don’t know…

It’s all just so fucked up.

I don’t know what the fuck is going on.

I want to cry right now.

Saw Trinidad.

He picked me up and we had a drink at Acapulco near campus. Nice time. He got more kissy after he had his drink. He’s a lightweight in drinking. That’s okay.

He drove all the way out here, so that was really nice. We might do something this weekend, not sure what. If not… no idea when I’ll see him again.

But… although I’m chatting with a couple of people, I think I’m going to disappear and go to bed!

I went…

and saw Little Miss Sunshine with Karina, a girl I met online.

We’ve been talking for a week or so through AIM – and thought we’d meet and see a movie.

The movie was awesome. I’ll definitely buy it on DVD.

Now… I’m bored. Booboo hasn’t texted me back in a bit – and he’s probably busy, but I’m still at the stage in the relationship where I worry, ya know?

Found out he is in the new movie “Accepted”. He wanted me to see that today instead of LMS – but I don’t particularly want to pay $8 to see that movie. If I find someone who wants to go, then I’ll go and see it, but I won’t go alone. He even said he won’t be caught dead watching it. I only have to go to see him. Cutie.

Anyway, I’m going to try to distract myself and read or something.

What?

Went to the mall with Berly yesterday. After she left I went to Borders and bought some books. I love me some books. I already read one. I spent a total of $9 and pennies.

Kama Sutra. Hahah!

I wrote down my schedule – made a pretty little schedule for school.

Yesterday I took care of paying my car registration and renewing my license. No more red stripe that says “Turns 21 in 2005″ across my license. WooHoo!

Didn’t get to see Trini yesterday. Booboo. That’s the new name. He’s my booboo. Not much talking so far today. I think I bugged him yesterday – although he gets annoyed when I don’t text him. I’ll text him again and see if he wants me to come out today. Either way, we’ll get together this weekend. *sigh*

I want school to start so I can stop being occupied with only one thing on my mind. I want to actually have things to do. One weekend, then school starts then… I’ll want to be on vacation again!

And… I think Wednesday… I have to go to work. I’m not sure. But just for a few hours. We’ll see.

Okay…. off to do something else.

I forgot to talk about my good news!

How could I?

So remember last month I took the CSET exam which would let me into the teaching credential program at CSUN. I thought I might past one test… but not all of them.

It’s a hard test. 5 hours long. 3 different subtests in:

1. 101
a) reading, language, and literature
b) history and social science

2. 102
a) science
b) mathematics

3. 103
a) physical education
b) human development
c) visual and performing arts

I mistakingly took all 3 sections at once (for a total of $222). Afterwards (but before taking the test) I realized I should have taken 1 section at a time. But by then it was too late to change.

But – somehow – I passed ALL THREE sections!

I got the results on Monday.

I CANNOT BELIEVE IT!!!!

Hollywood!

I might drive out to Hollywood to see Trinidad today. Makes me happy to go see him. Traffic isn’t that bad either. As far as he knows he doesn’t work tomorrow or Friday… so maybe we can get together, but I dunno. We shall see.

I might have been wrong about him… and I hope I was!